Barry Bremen – An All-Star Salute to Shenanigans

Cody: With Major League’s All-Star Game taking place this past Tuesday and all sports eyes tentatively tuning in (partly due to default), I began researching about the history of exhibition and All-Star games and quirky happenings within them. One of the best stories is known as The Mystery of the 1977 American League All-Star Team Photo. Every All-Star team takes a photo documenting the team. (Here and here as a bonus, is anything you ever wanted to know about the 1977 All-Star Game at Yankee Stadium. Don’t say I never gave you nothin’.) The All-Star photo was taken much like any other that had been done with one exception: there was a mystery person who snuck into the photo posing as a player who has yet to be identified thirty-two years later. ESPN writer Paul Lukas recently tried to nail down an explanation (including pictures) of the mystery here. How perfectly if fits the formula that an event that happens in the middle of the summer is coupled with shenanigans. What formula you ask? The Summer Shenanigan Occurrence Formula (the SNNOF) goes as this:

Mid-summer + abundance of unsupervised free time = outrageous ideas (probable outcome of trouble/lack of logical thinking)

Q: When does school start in the fall?
A: When kids start getting into trouble because they have run out of other things to do. It moves up further every year. The most trouble I ever got into was ALWAYS in the summer – because I simply ran out of things to do.

Allow me to introduce to you to the King of Shenanigans and the first (and only, so far) member into The Rebuilding Project Hall of Fame, ladies and gentleman, Barry Bremen. Why would an insurance salesman and marketing executive from West Bloomfield, Michigan get a nod into the Hall of Fame you ask? Well sir, this master of disguise swindled his way into the World Series as an umpire, an MLB and NBA All-Star Game as a player, the Dallas Cowboys sideline as a cheerleader, Super Bowl XV as a referee, and the 1985 Emmy Awards as the Best Supporting Actress. That’s why he’s in – he’s legit.

The 1979 All-Star Game in Seattle is where legend first took place. With the help of George Brett, took the field and managed to get into the All-Star Team photograph before he got the boot. That same year he wore a Kansas City Kings uniform and was on the floor for pregame warm-ups for the NBA All-Star game. Two years later he donned Houston Rockets duds and was again ushered out. In a 1980 issue of People, he was profiled and his wife Margo reasoning for why stating he was “fulfilling a grand fantasy to be in the limelight. He feels if you have no guts you have no glory in your life". In 1980 he got together a complete umpire’s outfit and football referee’s uniform and walked out onto the field with the other officials DURING THE WORLD SERIES AND THE SUPER BOWL and was given the boot when he was discovered. As if this wasn’t enough he decided in 1985 to go to the Emmy’s and when the Best Supporting Actress was named (Betty Thomas for her role in Hill Street Blues), he got up and accepted the award for her. Not a big deal right? The icing on the cake of all of his shenanigans came when he dropped 23 pounds, shaved his legs, and practiced drag dancing routines with his wife in order to land the role of his life. He spent $1,200 to get a replica Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders uniform made and get everything just right. Barrynita made it onto the field and yelled “Go Dallas!” before he was sacked by the Cowboys security team. They then nailed him with a $5,000 lawsuit for trespassing and creating a nuisance. Can you really put a price tag on pretending to be a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader when YOU’RE A DUDE? Yes, yes you can actually. In 1980, it cost $6,200.

Barry retired from gate-crashing in 2005. The terrorist attacks of September 11 have made security nearly impossible and have made it a serious offense to do such impostering. The Rebuilding Project does not endorse activities such as this (legally) but does recognize the amount of work Barry went through to make shenanigans fun for everyone. Barry was unable to make it to our Hall of Fame ceremony but we didn’t realize it until we gave his son, who has followed in his father’s footsteps, the acceptance plaque. Okay, I made that up but that would have been sweet. Congrats Barry, or whoever you are pretending to be today.

RE: WHAT’S CRO-MAGNON KAMANISH

Scott: I couldn't agree more about the way things have played out with Steve McNair. I definitely think that in efforts to gain ratings too many media outlets go for shock value at the expense of authentic and accurate reporting. We know that McNair was killed and that his girlfriend likely killed him. So let's break down what we KNOW for a fact: McNair had an affair, McNair was killed by the mistress who then killed herself. That's it. Anything beyond that is speculation and the major media outlets spend way too much of their time on what may happen (and eventually 80% of the time it doesn't) as opposed to what actually does happen. The reporting based on "Sources close to person x" or "anonymous sources" are some of the biggest flaws in media in general today. It leads to inaccurate reporting or the people in the news refuting the story, in which case once everything plays out someone ends up looking either stupid or a liar.

With that being said, talking about what may happen is fun and for the fans so if I can play devils advocate for a second I can see it from that angle. In a changing world of Twitter, Facebook and text messaging; being ahead of the curve is an important aspect of gaining respect as a media outlet. That's where a lot of the reporters go awry by trying to be the first to report that they often jump the gun.

So I'm going to try and be a fan for a second and say I can't wait for the next few weeks of the NBA off-season where a lot of the lesser free agents (Glen Davis, Channing Frye, etc) will be rumored to all sorts of teams from Europe to the Grizzlies. Not only that, but once the trade talk gets serious and teams start treating expiring contracts like superstar players.

In the spirit of this time of the year I have outlined the top expiring contracts which are most likely to be as sought after as Raef Lafrentz and the awful contracts which keep these teams from competing because of offering average to good free agents superstar contracts.

EXPIRING CONTRACTS




ALL-AWFUL CONTRACT TEAMS

WHAT’S CRO-MAGNON KAMANISH

Cody: Here’s what’s ugly on the sports front. Sadly there has been more negative light shed on athletes than the positive that they do. Quick, how many Bengals have been arrested in the past 5 years? More importantly though, how much have Bengals players donated to their charities? Of course the negative story always gets the glory. The drama, the speculation and the attention it generates.

Steve McNair will always be remembered for his ability to play with pain. The Walking Injury Report played with a bruised sternum, a sprained ankle, and bruised ribs AT THE SAME TIME. Four weeks ago I broke a couple of toes after stubbing them on a doorway. I still was able to play Xbox that night, don’t worry. The point is he donated over $30,000 to Boys and Girls Club charities, established the Air McNair Katrina Relief Fund, and The Steve McNair Foundation dedicated to bringing football and positive influences to underprivileged children.

While all these things have given him high marks on character and recognition, he will largely be remembered for being shot by his extramarital affair. No one can fully grip the pain and the thought process of his family after finding out about the death, let alone the pain that an extra affair causes. Let’s focus on the good, the camaraderie, the heart, and the passion of the games. Let’s hear more of the ‘hero’ stories and less of the scoundrels.

WHAT’S UGLY (WHAT’S SHELDON WILLIAMS)

Scott: You think Sheldon Williams is ugly, check this out.
Cody: Wow, you are right Chris Kaman is pretty (searching for right word) Cro-Magnon-ish. Sorry for the dig Sheldon, you have been pardoned! The section is now re-named "What’s Cro-Magnon Kamanish".

WHAT’S GOOD – The Resilience of Michigan

Cody: Dear Michigan,

I am sorry for your current economic situation. I am also sorry for the turn to negative town that the auto industry has taken. I am also sorry for mentioning the following but please hear me out:

• 2009 Stanley Cup – Red Wings loss in 7 games
• 2009 Final Four National Championship – Michigan State pummeling
• 2008-09 Detroit Lions go winless
• 2008-09 University of Michigan goes 3-9
• 2009 Tigers Stadium Demolished
• 2008 Detroit Tigers go 74-88

You know what. Life isn’t that bad. The University of Michigan made it to the Frozen Four for the 23rd time since 1948 last year. You’re like Clint Eastwood in Gran Torino; you’re keeping your neighborhood yours.
You will repaint the houses, you’ll clean out the gutters, and you’ll take out the trash. That’s what you’ll do. You’re in a slump right now, so what? You pull yourself together and embrace your neighbors and you’ll figure a way out of this mess.

People look to sports to generate an escape from reality. That’s why we go to a movie, that’s why the video game industry is booming. People look for a way out of reality except for right now, Michigan’s sports world is mimicking their real world.

But that’s it – just wait for when things turn around. Watch what it will mean to the fans when the teams get over the top and bring home a championship. The proud folks of Michigan are looking for something, a glimmer a hope to turn things around. The Red Wings have decided to stay in old downtown in Joe Louis Arena (named after hometown boxing legend Joe Louis), while the Lions and Tigers have fled to the west side of the city.

That’s the Michigan spirit – to name an arena after a hometown hero. Not just a high school, not just a road – and arena. That’s what Michigan does – they support their own. The Tigers may very well win the AL Central this year. We are pulling for you Michigan. Keep your heads up, because after all, that’s what Michigan does.

Sincerely,
Cody

WHAT’S BAD – Baseball Player Injuries

Scott: Not because it kills me when a professional baseball player suffers an injury but because something I will never understand is how baseball players are more injury prone than football or basketball players. They have a 15 Day DL for guys who get back spasms coughing (Sammy Sosa) or injuring your wrist flinging sunflower seeds (Greg Harris). See this article for a complete list.

These types of things happen in every sport and in every walk of life, but when a baseball player gets injured for a month after sliding into a base and tweaking an ankle are they really that serious are baseball players bigger pansies than soccer players?

WHAT’S GREAT – NBA Free Agency

Scott: If for nothing else it is great for the moves that teams make and the contracts they hand out thinking that a certain player will be their savior, or at least a major piece of the puzzle.

How else do you explain Brian Cardinal getting a two-year, $13 million deal (All remaining amounts)? Or Keith Van Horn getting a six-year, $73 million extension? Or Kenyon Martin robbing the Nuggets for a seven-year, $96 million contract? Shall I keep going??? Ok…

Andrei Kirilenko ($16.4 next season) making more than Kevin Garnett, Yao Ming, Amare Stoudemire, Joe Johnson, Deron Williams, LeBron and Carmelo? Or Gerald Wallace making $43 million over 4 years? This could go on forever, but the point is some of these teams are so desperate to have a game changer they will fork up huge cash for a player who had one good season in a contract year (Tim Thomas) or a guy who was a standout on a crappy team (Gerald Wallace) to lead them. But in reality they set the franchise back years because of the poor investment. This year’s poor investment? Hedo Turkolu and Trevor Ariza. Both are great role players on great teams, but ask them to carry a team for a whole season and they can’t do it. This is why NBA free agency is so great!

TRP - Disclosure

Scott: As I was sitting down to write my first post I have already figured out the roles that we will each play as we go forward with this whole blog thing…I can already see us being a “Tony Kornheiser – Michael Wilbon” like combination. Cody being the one bringing the comedy and entertainment value (Kornheiser) [Side note, did you know when you spell check Kornheiser the only suggestion you get is Cornhusker? That should make your heart swell Cody.] and me trying to keep up with facts and stats (Wilbon) to balance it out. Though those two are titans in their field and we are lowly peasants in the blogging industry I feel it is a fair analogy.



But before I start my side of the posting in this venture, I must provide the disclaimer that my favorite teams (and sports) which will most likely the ones to be the most commented on are NFL – Kansas City Chiefs, NBA – Phoenix Suns, MLB – Kansas City Royals, and NCAAB & NCAAF – Kansas State Wildcats (Big 12 football & basketball). Now that that’s out of the way let’s begin…….